6 Pointers To Handle Emotion

Emotions are a complicated thing. They can help you land the job of your dreams or prevent you from reaching your full potential. But what's the difference between being too emotional and simply displaying your passion for the business? It all depends on how you view emotions and the value you place on them.

Here are six tips to help you keep your emotions in the "safe zone" between passionate and passive:

Tip 1: Take a step back.
There are bound to be times when you are going to get angry at work. Rather than running to your boss fuming, take a step back to identify the issues that made you angry and develop proposed solutions. Present them to your supervisor or manager with calm reserve and enthusiasm for their potential positive outcomes. Presenting the situation on a rational level with the problem and solution clearly defined will encourage your manager to see you as a professional and to view the situation clearly. This can be tough for many people – especially those who aren't accustomed to holding back their emotional energy. But it's important that you wait until the smoke clears to see the total picture. If you don't, you run the risk of being viewed as someone who flies off the handle or is out of control.

Tip 2: Read signals carefully.
If you are one of those people with boundless energy and enthusiasm for most tasks, channel that energy and use it to your advantage. . . but do so carefully. There's nothing like eagerness to energize a project. Just be sure that your passion isn't over the top. In a recent issue of Harvard Business Review, Colleen Barrett, president and COO of Southwest Airlines, says, "I rely on calmer people around me to give me those raised eyebrows that say, ?lower the passion a little bit.'" You don't have to be the president of a company to read signals that say you're over the top. All you need to do is carefully observe the body language of the people around you. It can be a good indicator that you are getting too emotional.

Tip 3: Provide supporting facts.
When you're working on a project that you are really passionate about, back it up with facts and figures. Not only does providing objective data and solid rationale make good business sense, once you see the checks and balances in black and white you'll see if your emotional investment in the project is worth the energy you are expending on it.

Tip 4: Never let them see you sweat (or cry).
The ability to work as part of a team – or head one up – are critical skills that you'll need to succeed. In a professional environment, the team's success will largely depend on the give-and-take that will occur among members as the team works toward its goals. Team meetings can become emotionally charged as members share their opinions and beliefs. As a team leader, the ability to manage your own and others' emotions are crucial skills. One of the best ways to manage other peoples' emotions is to listen to them and show empathy for how they are feeling. People want to be listened to and heard, especially in the workplace where they have a lot of time invested. To manage your own emotions, concentrate on remaining calm and know that members will look to you as their emotional guide. If your emotional fires flare, so will theirs. When all else fails, suggest taking a break. A brief walk to the water cooler will give everyone a chance to calm down. While you are away from the group, identify what is upsetting your or others' emotional balance and come up with a strategy or two to work through it.

Tip 5: Find a confidant to share your triumphs and frustrations.
Sometimes just talking to someone who understands office dynamics can do wonders for your emotional outlook. "Venting," when done with someone who doesn't have the same emotional ties to your company or department that you do, is a healthy behavior because it hurts no one and allows you to release pent up feelings. Choose your confidants wisely and think twice before you let off steam with a fellow coworker who may betray your confidence.

Tip 6: Have balance in your life.
Another way to have emotional balance at work is to have balance in your life outside of work. If your personal life is full and happy, it's going to show at the office. Your tolerance for emotionally charged situations will be much higher and you are more likely to respond appropriately.

Stay Calm At Work

How can we maintain our professionalism and handle emotions like a man? Here are some tips.

1- Take a walk to cool down
During a meeting, when someone insults your management style or criticizes the department you lead, don't react in anger. Remove yourself from the situation as soon as you feel yourself getting hot under the collar. Fake a page or another call to extricate yourself from a non-productive telephone call so you can step outside to calm yourself. Giving yourself time to cool down will help you regain control of your emotions.

2- Ask for clarification before reacting
Stall for time by asking questions. Is your boss asking what time you arrived because he's challenging your integrity or is he trying to start a conversation about the traffic jam on the off-ramp? If need be, repeat what the other person just said. This ensures you understand the comment and gives your colleague or client the opportunity to clarify any miscommunication.

3- Apply the 10-second rule
Ensure you're not overreacting. If you feel your temper flaring on the phone or in a meeting, count to 10 to keep you from losing your cool. Analyze the facts before going on a rant or becoming defensive.

4- Talk to someone who can calm you down
Always have someone to confide in, inside and outside of the office, about your frustrations. Go for a beer together on a regular basis to vent. You cannot keep all your feelings inside, or your health will suffer. Acknowledge and express your emotions appropriately with a close friend, and be prepared to listen whenever he's ready to explode, and both of your careers will benefit.

5- Work out to work off your anger
Don't blow your professional image by letting others see you freak out, pound the desk or scream. Go to the gym instead. Working out will help you release those pent-up emotions.

6- Recognize what ticks you off
Be alert to the types of situations that knock you off-center. If you don't like questions interrupting your presentation, plan how you'll handle any hecklers. Planning a positive way to react will help you defuse your anger before it throws you off. If you know you have a short fuse or you're a perfectionist, learn how to deal with it so it doesn't hurt your professional image.

7- Understand your colleagues
Read your colleagues' signals. What initially seems to be a snide comment might be a feeble attempt at humor. By getting to know your coworkers' characters and personalities, you won't be blind-sided when they do or say something that irritates you.

8- Anticipate other people's reactions
When you're proposing a radical new work process or time schedule, you can be fairly certain your employees' first thoughts won't be about the cost savings and increased productivity. Focus on the personal benefits they will experience and you'll keep your own frustration in check. If your boss is constantly critical, anticipate his reactions to problems and proposals, and have persuasive arguments ready to get him on your side.

9- Prepare yourself to stay calm
Anticipate any objections or questions you might face when you're making a presentation, especially ones that might put you in a bad light. Create a backup plan if there's a technical glitch in case your PowerPoint presentation freezes on you. Before going into your Performance Review meeting, have some accomplishments ready to offset any negative feedback, so you don't respond in anger.

10- Wait before writing a strongly worded e-mail
Never disrespect others, even if you're right. It's easy to let contempt, fury or resentment cloud our judgment. Hold that strongly worded business e-mail or letter until the next day and reread it. Ask someone else to proofread any correspondence you think might be surly, condescending or rude.

11- Let go of your anger at the end of each day
Get into the habit of letting go of your anger as you leave work every day. Otherwise it could fester and make you more likely to blow your cool. Focus on doing something you enjoy once you leave the office, whether it's hanging out with friends or watching the game on TV, and leave the stress and emotion behind.

12- Apologize for any emotional outbursts
Despite your best intentions, if you end up erupting in a meeting, criticize a colleague's work or make ill-timed comments that you regret, how can you backpedal without losing face? Apologize immediately to the targeted person and to everyone around who may have heard. You don't need to offer a long-winded explanation of the pressures you were under, the background on the misunderstanding or the reasons you thought you were right. Saying "I reacted badly and I am sorry" will demonstrate your professionalism, integrity and leadership skills.

Strong leaders with strong characters will have strong feelings. That doesn't mean you should allow your emotions to control you, cloud your judgment and cause career missteps.

Recognizing the signs that you're getting angry will help you get over it quickly, without anyone noticing. Replacing your negative emotions with self-confidence and maintaining a healthy balance in your life will help you deal with difficult moments. No matter what, don't snap. It takes years to build up a reputation, and only seconds to destroy it.

From www.askmen.com